I think that people have children because they are petrified of their lives and they feel absolutely purposeless. They plunge headfirst into this pre-made identity, abandoning their fears and insecurities at the welcome mat; they drop right on out, alongside the bloody placenta.
Motherhood does't exist to validate your existence. Don't have babies because you can't get your shit together and you are 16 and afraid. Have children because you are ready, you are stable, and you figured your shit out a few years ago through a wild and tumultuous youth. Have children because you are willing and able to spend your days pleasing them, helping them, and serving them. Have children because you want to be a stay-at-home mother or father and you believe there is truth to the testament that attachment parenting is the best way to raise a child. Have children because you work hard as fuck at a job that affords you the ability to give your child the best care possible. Have children because you want to provide people with broken parts and broken hearts the opportunity to be parents.
Don't have children out of fear. Your kids will grow up to be scared, because that shit is contagious.
Don't have children because you don't know who you are. They wont be able to tell you.
Most of all, don't have children because you think you have to. It may be your biological imperative to procreate, but biological imperatives do not pay the bills or offer tenderness in the middle of the night when your child is colicky.
And if you do have kids before you are ready, learn how to make sacrifices.
No comments:
Post a Comment